If you see a chance to be kind to someone tomorrow, take it.Brad Pitt, Golden Globes 2020
how much do I love him AND how much do I wholeheartedly agree!
yet, I’m guessing 99.9% of those who took Brad up on his advice didn’t take it
to heart in the most vital way; by showing any of that kindness to the most
important person in their lives…themselves.
that is problem.
self-care has gratefully gotten more popular, being kind to yourself is looked
upon as indulgent, even antagonistic to success; i.e., if you aren’t hard on
yourself, you won’t strive to be better.
as a coach working with people on removing the blocks that keep them from
happiness and success, I’m disheartened by some of the horrible things I hear
people say to “inspire” themselves: “I’m the worst”, “if I wasn’t so lazy”,
“everyone else is better”…
Are these encouraging words? Would you say these things to a child and expect them to thrive?
why should this inspire you?
being kind to yourself will better help you achieve goals because, with
kindness, you feel stronger and more inspired.
yet, quitting beat-up behavior is challenging; we get pretty skilled at it over
time. Gratefully, there is a trick to showing your fear-brain that you are
unequivocally someone to be kinder to…and it’s called FACT!
we confront fear-fueled negative self-talk with proof of our success, it’s
easier to see that it’s just (MADE-UP) anxiety that keeps us stuck in our
narrative of failure. With facts, we can say we’ve achieved before and feel we
can do it again.
Recognize Accomplishments Past & Present
back to times when you had a win, big or small: graduating school, receiving an
honor, getting promoted, completing a project, or even putting yourself on a
dating site or going on a blind date.
your wins, write them down and lean in. I mean literally refer back to the list
when you start unleashing that unkind monologue upon yourself.
list will help you snuff out the flames of your fears and allow you to re-connect
to your best self; setting yourself up for success.
like looking back at past achievements, confront your brain’s completely made-up
supposition that you aren’t someone to be kind to by highlighting wins daily.
you take the stairs? Did you support a friend in need? Did you meet a deadline?
may be a struggle. Our brains are more comfortable and practiced at seeing
problems and missteps. So, like the past accomplishments, be sure to write down
daily wins and refer back when you stumble into self-doubt.
these 2 practical tips for achieving the most essential kindness – that which
you show to yourself – you will turn Brad Pitt’s words into a truly life changing
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